FAMILY & PARENTING · Uncategorized

You are more beautiful than you think

beautiful

It doesn’t matter what you look like or how accomplished you are, apparently most women (a large number definitely, if not most) undervalue themselves in almost all areas of their lives. Especially when compared to the hunky opposite gender. Our dear male counterparts mostly (all in fact, if not mostly) believe they are better than what they actually are!!!

Women know they are good, just not ‘how’ good in whatever they do, continuously underselling ourselves and believing less of ourselves. A woman’s self perception is often poorer than the reality.

A mother (working or stay at home) will often berate herself and probably feel guilty for spending less time with her children. When in actuality she would be probably ensuring she spends as much time as she can with her children. The fathers on the other hand, feel great that they spent half an hour with the children!

In one of her TED talks COO – Facebook, Sheryl Sandberg, spoke of women learning to ‘Sit at the table’. She was implying that women tend to sit by the sidelines and do not believe they are worthy of sitting at the table with their peers (mostly men). The men, I suppose don’t understand why there are even chairs on the sidelines.

As per a recent survey comparing men and women on their driving, it was found that women are actually better drivers than men!!!

http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/577366/women-better-drivers-men

So for greater road safety, women all over should be on the road riding / driving. But something holds us back!

Now here comes the crazy bit. ‘Only 28 per cent of women believed they were better drivers than men.’

Insane right? Research is telling us we are better but we just don’t think so. And it gets crazier.

As per this very survey ‘only 13 per cent of men thought women were superior behind the wheel’.

It’s not about putting the male gender down but uplifting the female gender to believe they are as good as they are. And to do that we all (males and females) need to constantly encourage young budding girls, instill confidence in them and have less stereotypical understanding of what females can and cannot do. Apparently women can do a whole lot of things, a whole lot better than the men. J We just need to be told this on and on and on. And it’s not the words (as important as they are) as much as the actions.

My father insisted I learn to drive as soon as I turned 18 and a month into 18, I had my license. As a family we love road trips and this meant papa had a third person at the wheel (my mother being the second). On one such drive on the then notorious Delhi Chandigarh highway (the new highway as it exists now had just started being constructed – so plenty of diversions and general mayhem), a diversion led us to a railway track crossing. As can be expected there was a log jam and we were inching our way when suddenly another car comes on the wrong side and now parallel to our car wanted to edge in front of us. My parents had recently bought their first saloon car and I was at the wheel. My dad calmly but firmly said, “ You will not allow that car to get in front of you”. That car was on the wrong and as is the case was completely disregarding the rules and others who were patiently waiting for their turn. My dad didn’t go out and start a verbal attack but it was clear I couldn’t let that car get ahead. With my dad’s backing, I persisted and a time came when side view mirrors were pulled in and we were barely inches away. The guy behind the wheel probably had thought he could bully this young girl. But he didn’t know that for my father the car was not important at all; my confidence as a driver and as a girl was far more important for him. For a second I nearly backed away and my father very categorically said, “don’t worry about the car getting scratched”!

Typical of Indian roads, victory was to the brave – an inexperienced young female driver backed by her super supportive father.

There was no looking back thereafter except in the rear view mirrors. 🙂

Its little incidents like these that go a long way in building confidence. This one definitely helped my driving confidence. And there are many such examples we all have / need in our lives (in different spheres, I might add) that allow us to flourish as individuals.

 

If you have daughters / girlfriends / wives it’s especially important to make them believe they are ‘worth it’ in all possible spheres of life and that they are more beautiful than they think. 🙂

Staring into the mirror I was getting distressed that one of my features had alarmingly overgrown my face. My husband couldn’t believe my insanity and then showed me this heartwarming and poignant campaign by Dove. I took the liberty of using its tag line for this blog post title. Its what spurred me to write this post in the first place. Please do see it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBLokAa_6Y8

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